To Write, Or Not To Write: Romance Pet Peeves

I consider myself a love story connoisseur. I write it, I read it. From young adult to new adult to just plain adult, I've read so many different stories featuring a romantic subplot. From science fiction to fantasy to contemporary, there's no genre I won't read so long as it features a love story.

So why am I talking about this? Good question, reader. The reason I'm discussing love stories is that there are a number of things I don't like when it comes to romance novels. Today, I'll be breaking down a few tropes that need to die a slow and painful death. This is only part one, so anticipate I'll probably do a part two soon.

One. Possessive Guys

These are probably most common in young adult and new adult fiction. You know the type; he who thinks his love interest is a territory and therefore belongs to him. Don't get me wrong, it's adorable when a male love interest refers to the main character as "his girl" and even I adore that. But I can't stand when a guy is so possessive he will literally beat up any person who looks at the main character. This happens way too often, folks.

Another example would be how in Beautiful Disaster by Jamie Mcguire, there's a scene where her love interest tells her to change her dress because it's "too sexy" and only he gets to look at her like that.

I don't think it's sexy to have a male love interest who believes he's entitled to his girlfriend or boyfriend. I don't think it's sexy to have a protagonist who allows herself to be berated and constantly ordered around by her possessive male love interest. This behavior is too often excused because he's attractive. Considering primary audiences of these novels are young, impressionable women, we as authors and readers don't need to be creating/supporting books that communicate this type of relationship as being healthy.

Two. Boys Will Be Boys

Recently I read a story wherein two different books and on two different occasions with two different characters, the author tried to make it seem like it was okay for a male character to berate and bully a female character because she doesn't want to have sex with him. LIKE WHAT??

Too often, behavior like this in fiction is written off as acceptable. Consent is a universal thing, and it should never be okay for any character to ignore consent. Especially because, again, the audience of these novels is young and impressionable and should understand his/her right to consent. 

Another example I feel the need to address is the sort of scene where a guy is kissing a girl, and she tries to push him away, but he continues kissing her even though she's rejected him. Eventually, of course, she gets into it, which means it's okay he didn't listen to her the first time when she said no. 

Consent is key, people.

Okay, so my third and final issue for this post is simple.

Three. The Douchebag

In YA fiction especially, male love interests can often be introduced as crass, rude, or outright mean individuals who berate or bully the main character. But rather than being smart and avoiding a guy who treats her like the fuzzy leftovers you find in the back of your fridge a year after the meal, she becomes INFATUATED with him.

Here's a great example. In Fallen by Lauren Kate, the first time the main character meets the love interest, Daniel, he flips her off. He literally flips her off, and she's suddenly in love with him. There's a difference between a love interest being a "bad boy" but being loveable and having charisma, and a guy being a jerk and having the charisma of a paper bag.

Again, if any guy ever talks to me like this, I will call him out immediately, because that behavior is not okay. The same should be true in fiction. Female characters need to stand up for themselves more often.

All in all, I know I've just barely scratched the surface of cliches in love stories that need to be kicked to the curb, but it's important to draw attention to this issues to hopefully build a more positive future for fiction.

That was my two cents. See y'all next time.

-Mads